The Cost of Leaving a Church

To leave a Christian group can involve a painful loss. In addition to the pain of condemnation, there is the potential loss of family and friends. For some, it can mean an economic loss. Some may experience grief or grief mixed with relief.

A religious way of life is an investment—a call to commitment (Mt 10:37–38).

The social psychology principle of sunk costs helps explain why some, but not all, Christians continue to support traditional views about biblical texts and doctrines such as those dealing with creation, morality, or sexuality. In contrast, some Christians seem able to throw off old ways of thinking or behaving with relative ease.

The notion of sunk costs refers to the way some investors fail to cut their losses from a bad investment. Instead, they pour more money into it hoping for a recovery. It appears to be a part of human nature to conserve what one has rather than take a loss and look for better options.

The application of sunk costs to leaving a religious group involves the investment of emotional energy into preserving beliefs and traditions even when people find the old beliefs or traditions no longer make sense to them.

Some cope with sunk costs by investing time in religious causes or programs; others energetically devour new Christian books as they search for new insights that will reassure them that their faith investment still makes sense. Some Christians find themselves trapped as professors at conservative Christian colleges or leaders in conservative Christian organizations. They continue to invest their lives in these positions rather than take the risk of leaving for a more compatible environment.

Geoffrey W. Sutton, PhD is Emeritus Professor of Psychology. He retired from a clinical practice and was credentialed in clinical neuropsychology and psychopharmacology. His website is www.suttong.com

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Dr. Sutton’s posts are for educational purposes only. See a licensed mental health provider for diagnoses, treatment, and consultation.

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