Geoff W. Sutton Blog

What Christian Counselors Believe, Value, and Practice Part 2: Values Should Christian counselors be exempt from providing premarital counseling to same-sex couples if their group believes same-sex marriage is sin? In this post I look at some values held by people in our sample of Christian Counselors. Last week I reported their Christian beliefs, which we (Chris Arnzen and me) thought important to understand key features of the type of Christianity held by the people completing the survey. This week I look at some of their key values—values that polarize families, churches, and groups of Christians. Why ask about values? Three Reasons The first is disclosure . Counselors and psychotherapists (I will use a generic term, clinicians) often disclose personal information in the course of treatment. Odds are, if you went to a therapist, you learned something personal—research indicates 90% of clinicians disclose personal informatio n. The effects on clients are ...

Weddings : Values that Can Lead to a  Successful Marriage Two young people I know plan to marry this Sunday. My wife and I have known the groom and his parents for years. I came to know the bride when she was a college student worker. To all appearances, they are a beautiful couple in a loving and committed relationship. They met in college, dated, obtained master’s degrees from the same university, and attend the same church. Theirs will be a Christian wedding. Weddings and Culture Like a long flowing gown, or a brides' aisle walk to meet her bridegroom, weddings retain a cultural trail of values. Cultural traditions are often integrated with religious ceremony. Royal ceremonies encourage fantasies in children’s books suggest enchantment in romantic novels and movies for girls and women (and some men) of all ages.  Religious stories illustrate blessed relationships and joyful celebrations. Weddings used to mark the beginning of a new life together. ...

Marriage & Relationship Quiz Updated QUESTIONS ONLY  (Answers Below) 1. According to the Rand Corporation, about what percentage of white females entered a cohabiting relationship in the U.S. by age 23? 2. On average, what is the age when women first marry in the U.S.? 3. In the U.S., at what young age can people commonly marry with parental approval? 4. In the U.S., divorce rates remained stable at about what percent of marriages? 5. In a split decision, the U. S. Supreme Court found the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) unconstitutional in June. How many judges decided against DOMA? 6. In the U.S., remarriage has declined by what percent in the past 20 years? 7. Same-sex marriage is legal in how many U. S. States? 8. According to the Pew Forum, how many countries permit same-sex marriage? 9. According to the Independent, at least how many countries recognize polygamous marriages? 10. In the U.S. Muslims and fundamentalist Mormons practi...

Premarital     Counseling Boom Good news . People still fall in love and want to marry. Couples want their marriages to last. And many are willing to invest in premarital counseling. Bad news . Marriage rates are at an all-time low and recent divorce rates remain high. And the research on the possible benefits of premarital counseling is not impressive. See post about marriage in 2013 . Breaking news (almost). According to a Fox News story published 21 January 2014, “The Colorado Marriage Education Act would require potential spouses to complete 10 hours of pre-wedding marriage education. Twenty hours would be required for second marriages and 30 hours for third marriages, KDVR.com reported Monday.” Why Do People Think Premarital Counseling Helps? 1. Engaged couples feel satisfied with the programs they attended. Some even think premarital counseling is fun . But some complain about the negativity when programs discuss pitfalls. 2. One ...

Marriage & Relationship Quiz For 2013 See the post from December 27 for a review of marriage and relationship changes in 2013 along with links to news and research sources. QUESTIONS ONLY  (Answers Below) 1. According to the Rand Corporation, about what percentage of white females entered a cohabiting relationship in the U.S. by age 23? 2. On average, what is the age when women first marry in the U.S.? 3. In the U.S., at what young age can people commonly marry with parental approval? 4. In the U.S., divorce rates remained stable at about what percent of marriages? 5. In a split decision, the U. S. Supreme Court found the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) unconstitutional in June. How many judges decided against DOMA? 6. In the U.S., remarriage has declined by what percent in the past 20 years? 7. Same-sex marriage is legal in how many U. S. States? 8. According to the Pew Forum, how many countries permit same-sex marriage? 9. According to the...

MARRIAGE & RELATIONSHIPS: A REVIEW OF 2013 The large world religions offer direction about moral relationships and offer ceremonies to celebrate the beginning of a marriage. Religions generally frown on or prohibit divorce. Adultery is perhaps the most commonly accepted reason for divorce. Monogamy is the norm in most religions but polygamy is widespread in Asia and Africa and Muslims are permitted to have up to four wives (Qur'an 4:2-3). The legal status of relationships changed for many couples in 2013; however, the fact that same sex couples could legally marry in many parts of the world does not indicate whether there were changes in the number of same-sex couples who lived together. Given the moral stance of most religions against same-sex marriage, one would expect same-sex couples will have to wed outside of places of worship. Will they be welcomed into holy places? Time will tell? For example, in the UK, England and Wales allow same-sex marriage but those m...